BLAH

The past few days have been really stressful for me. I am just stressed to the max. I can not wait to go away to the Women of Faith conference next week. I have a feeling all the emotions are just gonna come flowing out. I better pack some tissues! I really need to recharge. I feel like I am just trying to stay afloat sometimes. The loss of the baby just compounded everything 100 times. I still have lots of hormones that are going back to normal and it is quite the ride. I kind of feel PMS all the time. And to top it off I am almost positive that I have kidney stones. I go back to the OB on Tuesday so they should be able to tell me once they take my urine whether or not I have them for sure. I know I should see someone other than the OB, but I already have to appointment for a check up to be sure my body expelled everything so I may as well find out from him rather than pay to go to yet another doctor.

I am at a spot now where I am just BLAH. That just sums up my general mood BLAH! I am trying to hold on it is just hard to be happy. And people wonder "what is wrong?" This is just something that is so hard to understand unless you have been there. You feel bad long after it is all over. You have good days, and you may not bring it up but you still hurt. People just assume that after a few weeks all is good. I wish it was that easy. I know over time it will get easier, it just really sucks to go through it.

And for all who read this...if you think of it...say a little prayer for my friend. She just lost her little boy and needs all the prayers she can get. I know how I feel loosing something, that to most people did not even exist. I cannot imagine being in her position and my heart breaks for her. Out of respect for her, I will not go into detail, I just ask that you pray for her if you think of it.

Tomorrow is a new day and I am thankful for that. It was by far not my most depressing day...just not my best day either. And now I am off to snuggle up in blankets cause I am shivering sitting here at the computer. The weather says it is currently 52 degrees outside and it will be 44 degrees tonight. I am so tempted to turn on the heat but I will not.

Did I mention that I still can not use the apostrophe key without some short cut coming up? I can not figure out how to turn it off and I forgot to mention it to Phil so I have to continue to write out... CAN NOT, HAVE NOT, WAS NOT, IS NOT ETC. ETC. I need to be able to use the apostrophe key! UGH!

Ok off to bed....well the couch (that is where I sleep when Phil is not home) I go.

And for all you bloggers out there......BLOG! I am bored and want to be nosy and read about your lives!!! No one in blogging lately!! LOL!